GRANDslump: the emotional dip after visits with grands when your heart is both full and empty.

When your heart is so full because you get to be part of their day to day lives – and then all of a sudden you are home. Or they have left your home.

And while at first, the peace and quiet and time to sleep is great. But then it feels so quiet!

The grandkids and parents go back to their often-busy life, and you are left with this feeling of ‘wow that was amazing time together’…now what?

Today I’m attempting to answer this question.

 GRANDslump is just a fancy name for the emotions, sometimes quite intense, that surface after you have time with your grandchildren – and also the dip emotionally when you haven’t been able to see them – but have had to see all your friends’ posting photos of themselves with their grandchildren.

So whether you had a grand visit in-person, virtually or didn’t get the time with them you wanted, read on because these strategies for long distance grandparenting are designed to address whatever post-holiday scenario you are facing right now.

What everyone else recommends

There are the regular things psychologists and doctors always advocate for when it comes to improving mood. Getting exercise, sleeping well and eating nutrient dense foods.

But in this blog, I want to go beyond the usual suspects and focus on 5 things you can do to alleviate the emotional dip, while also strengthening relationships.

5 Things You Can Do to Cope with the GRANDslump:

Be gentle with yourself.

When we are feeling down, it’s so important to practice self-compassion. This means turning compassion inward. Talk to yourself as you would talk to a friend who was struggling. Give yourself permission to be sad or disappointed.

And know that you are not alone. My Facebook post about the GRANDslump received thousands of likes and shares because it’s a thing.

Plus, I’ve heard from so many grandparents over the years who feel this way. Many look for a support group specifically for long distance grandparents coping with these feelings.

Commit to one new thing you will try out this year to boost your connection with your grandchildren.

Getting into action to overcome an emotional dip can be both therapeutic and productive. If you are reading this, you are already likely grandparenting with intention or you want to be more intentional about your relationship with your grandchild.

Start small.

Maybe you will send a monthly note with encouraging words or a weekly video on Saturday mornings telling them something wonderful about themselves. You are the grand cheerleader – and cheerleading can be done from a distance!

Create a Grand Gratitude List.

Write down 5 things you are grateful for about being a grandparent. The science around gratitude is impressive and it’s something I’ve incorporated on and off into my daily habits.

I find that relationships and people are often on my gratitude list.

The beautiful thing about doing this is that you can refer to your Grand Gratitude list on those extra tough days.

Use humor.

Search for some silly jokes to share with your grandchildren. Whether it’s a video of you sharing a joke or slipping some jokes into a card, creating something for them that allows you to exercise your funny bone can help your own mood.

I heard this joke the other day, and it still makes me smile:

Did you know that if you clean a vacuum cleaner, you are a vacuum cleaner?

Silliness is a good remedy for feelings of sadness.

DeeDee Moore from More Than Grand shared this funny visual of the GRANDslump on her Instagram account. It is so fitting!

Read this reflection about an antidote to GrandSlump.

It was written by a fellow long distance grandparent and author (and member of The LDG Society!) Shirley Showalter:

An Antidote to GrandSlump: Those Simple Little Pleasures

A final word

Remember, you are not alone in feeling this way. Be kind to yourself and reach out to talk to friends about it. If they aren’t long distance grandparents, they might not fully get it, but hopefully they can offer some compassion and an ear to listen!

And don’t forget, I send out weekly emails with ideas and inspirations to stay connected. I’d love for you to join the list and see how I can help you nurture your relationship with your grandchildren. You can do that here and at the same will receive my free resource:

3 Key Ways to Build Stronger Bonds with Your Grandchildren for Long Distance Grandparents